god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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