PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
