I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize