she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
my sisters under your porch take her home
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
