I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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