I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
