piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
