Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
There r osticjed everywhere
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
