You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize