Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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