Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
