is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
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