You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
