I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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