Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
