sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
