was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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