i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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