I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize