Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
