Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
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