Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
soo... how was my night?
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