To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
