physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
