Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
