I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize