i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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