It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
