You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
