Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
