Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
someone owes me an orgasm
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
