Just fell off a train. Bad.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
we should paint friendship bongs
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