Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize