Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
