i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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