Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
he shaved USA in his pubs
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
