if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
