Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
