It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize
