dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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