love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
