"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
we made out on top of his cat.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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