The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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