I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
