I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
