this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
no you cant smoke seaweed
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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