he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
