so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize