both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Randomize
