If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize