I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
