I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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