How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
